The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days
in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he
takes his very life into his own hands. This is a handy guide
that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of
every husband, boyfriend, or significant other.
DANGEROUS : |
What's for dinner? |
SAFER : |
Can I help you with dinner? |
SAFEST : |
Where would you like to go for dinner? |
ULTRASAFE : |
Here, have some chocolate. |
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|
DANGEROUS : |
Are you wearing that? |
SAFER : |
Gee, you look good in brown. |
SAFEST : |
WOW! Look at you! |
ULTRASAFE : |
Here, have some chocolate. |
|
|
DANGEROUS : |
What are you so worked up about? |
SAFER : |
Could we be overreacting? |
SAFEST : |
Here's fifty dollars. |
ULTRASAFE : |
Here, have some chocolate. |
|
|
DANGEROUS : |
Should you be eating that? |
SAFER : |
You know, there are a lot of apples left. |
SAFEST : |
Can I get you a glass of wine with that? |
ULTRASAFE : |
Here, have some chocolate. |
|
|
DANGEROUS : |
What did you do all day? |
SAFER : |
I hope you didn't overdo it today. |
SAFEST : |
I've always loved you in that robe! |
ULTRASAFE : |
Here, have some more chocolate. |
And remember: Money talks...but chocolate sings.
